Thinking of leaving your program
Staying can be brave. Leaving can be brave too. Either way, you deserve to decide with care and support.
By the numbers
Leaving is far more common than most programs admit.
Finishing and leaving
The long road
You are not the only one thinking this
Many students wonder about leaving, and many do.
In a large U.S. study, only about 57% of doctoral students had finished within ten years. A review of research on doctoral students found that the reasons people struggle and leave include supervision, department culture, money and personal life, not only ability.
Why people think about leaving
Common reasons, and which ones might be fixable.
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Supervision is one of the biggest outside factors linked with doctoral progress and wellbeing.
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Depression and anxiety are common among PhD students. Health problems can sometimes be helped with support or a leave of absence, without leaving for good.
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People change during long programs. Wanting a different life is a valid reason to go.
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Personal and social life is one of the factors linked with doctoral progress. Leave or part-time study may be options.
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Talk to people with your degree who work in many different settings before deciding the degree has no value for you.
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Before you leave, consider talking to the ombuds, Title IX or graduate school office. You may have options to change your situation.
Before you decide: a bad season or a bad fit?
Ways to slow down and see clearly.
Big decisions made in the middle of exhaustion or crisis can be hard to trust. If you can, give yourself some time and space before deciding.
Questions to ask yourself
- If my advisor, money or health problem were fixed, would I want to stay?
- What would I do next if I left? Does that excite me or just feel like relief?
- Have I felt this way for weeks, or for a year or more?
- What would I tell a friend in my place?
- What does staying cost me, and what does leaving cost me?
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Ideas
- Talk to three people working in the field you’re drawn to
- Try an internship or short project outside academia
- Spend a month with a changed set-up (new advisor, part-time, new topic)
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Pick a date to decide, and what you need to know by then. It turns a fog into a project.
Options between “stay” and “quit”
It is rarely an all-or-nothing choice.
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Many schools offer medical or personal leave. Ask your graduate school office what happens to funding, insurance, housing and visa status during leave.
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Ask whether your program offers a master’s “on the way” or on leaving, and what it requires. This can turn years of work into a degree.
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Some students move to a program that fits their interests or life better. Ask which credits might transfer.
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Some programs allow part-time status or longer timelines. Check how this affects funding and visas.
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Leaving is a legitimate decision. The skills and experience you gained come with you.
Practical things to check
Questions to ask before you make it official.
Rules differ a lot between schools and funders, so ask in writing and keep the answers. This is general information, not legal or financial advice.
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Ask
- When does my stipend stop?
- Will I owe any tuition, fees or fellowship money back?
- When do my student loan payments start?
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If you lose a student health plan, you may be able to join a parent’s plan if you are under 26, or use the Marketplace, where savings depend on income.
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Ask for the move-out deadline before you announce your decision, so you have time to plan.
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Ask
- Will I stay an author on papers I contributed to?
- What do I need to hand over to the lab?
- Can I keep copies of my own writing?
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Ask a supportive faculty member or supervisor now if they will be a reference later.
If you are on a student visa
Talk to your DSO before you do anything.
For F and M students, the Department of Homeland Security says your designated school official (DSO) should be the first person you talk to. Speak to them before you drop classes, take a break or transfer.
Time limits after leaving can be short. Federal rules give F-1 students who withdraw with their DSO’s authorization 15 days to leave the U.S. Leaving without telling your DSO can cost you options.
Ask your DSO about
- Changing to another visa status
- How a leave of absence affects your status
- How long you can stay after leaving
- Transferring to another school
Grief, guilt, relief and identity
Mixed feelings are normal, whatever you decide.
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Even a good decision can bring loss: of a plan, a title, a community. Let yourself feel it.
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Past years are spent either way. The real question is what the next years will give you.
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Leaving is a choice about your life, not a moral failing.
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Relief is useful information. It can tell you how heavy things had become.
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Becoming a scholar is part of doctoral training, so leaving can shake your sense of self. Your curiosity and skills are still yours.
Telling your advisor, family and friends
What to say, and what you don’t have to explain.
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What you might say
- “I’ve thought about this carefully, and I’ve decided to leave the program at the end of this term.”
- “I’m grateful for what I’ve learned here. I’d like to make the handover as smooth as I can.”
You don’t have to
- Share health details
- Win an argument
- Justify your choice at length
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What you might say
- “I know this might be a surprise. I’ve thought about it a lot and I feel this is right for me.”
- “I’m not giving up on my future. I’m choosing a different path to it.”
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A short answer for anyone
- “It wasn’t the right fit for me anymore, and I’m excited about what’s next.”
If someone else is leaving: what helps
- “That sounds like a really hard decision. How are you feeling about it?”
- “I’m here for you whatever you decide.”
- Avoid: “But you were so close!” or “What a waste.”
Life after leaving
What you learned comes with you.
Grad school builds skills that many employers value: research, writing, data, teaching, project management and persistence. Describe them in plain words, not academic jargon.
First steps
- Ask your campus career center for help, even after you leave if they allow it
- List the skills you used each week in your program
- Rest before you rush into the next thing
- Talk to people who left grad school and built careers they like
When and where to get help
You don’t have to make this decision alone.
Reach out if
- You feel trapped, with no good options
- The decision is taking over your sleep and health
- You feel hopeless or have thoughts of suicide
Where to start
- Talk confidentially to the ombuds, graduate school office or a trusted mentor.
- Book time with your campus counseling center.
- Talk with your clinical provider about your health.
- If you are on a visa, talk to your DSO.
- Call or text 988, or chat at chat.988lifeline.org, any time you need to talk to someone right now. You can also text HOME to 741741.
Outside the U.S., findahelpline.com lists free, confidential helplines in more than 175 countries.
📝 Worksheets for this guide
Fill these in privately in the app. Your answers stay on your phone.
Sources
- Council of Graduate Schools (CGS) (2008). Ph.D. Completion and Attrition: Analysis of Baseline Demographic Data from the Ph.D. Completion Project
- National Center for Science and Engineering Statistics (NCSES), U.S. National Science Foundation (2025). Table 1-12. Median years to research doctorate, by broad field of doctorate: 1974–2024 (Survey of Earned Doctorates)
- Scientific Reports (via PubMed) (2021). Systematic review and meta-analysis of depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideation among Ph.D. students (Satinsky EN, et al.)
- International Journal of Doctoral Studies (2018). The PhD Experience: A Review of the Factors Influencing Doctoral Students’ Completion, Achievement, and Well-Being (Sverdlik A, Hall NC, McAlpine L, Hubbard K)
- HealthCare.gov, Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services. Health coverage options for young adults
- Study in the States, U.S. Department of Homeland Security. Maintaining Status
- Legal Information Institute, Cornell Law School. 8 CFR § 214.2 Special requirements for admission, extension, and maintenance of status (paragraph (f)(5))
- 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
- Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
- Crisis Text Line. Crisis Text Line
- Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). Crisis Text Line (resource listing)
- ThroughLine. Find A Helpline
- International Association for Suicide Prevention (IASP). Crisis centres
This guide is for education and self-care. It is not a diagnosis or a substitute for professional care. Please talk to a counselor or clinical provider about your health. Reviewed October 2026.
