Women veterans

Some women feel they don’t “count” because they didn’t deploy, didn’t see combat, or served a short time. Others played down their service while in uniform to fit in.

VA eligibility is based on your service and discharge, not on combat or gender. If you served, you can ask what care and benefits you qualify for.

A report on women veterans describes a “double bind”. Women who were in combat may find their stories doubted. Women who weren’t may find their service brushed aside.

Both can leave you feeling that your experience doesn’t fit anywhere. Naming this can help. It is a gap in how people see service, not a gap in you.

Many women joined hoping for a “brotherhood” and found themselves on the outside. Being highly visible in uniform, then invisible as a veteran, is a common story.

This can make coming home lonely. It is one reason connecting with other women who served can feel like such a relief. The “Finding your sisterhood” section has ideas.

Trauma can come from combat, accidents, loss, or harm from people you served with. Upsetting memories, feeling on edge, avoiding reminders and feeling numb are common reactions. Proven talk therapies help, even years later.

When VA providers ask, about 1 in 3 women veterans and 1 in 50 men say they experienced MST. These numbers only include veterans who use VA, so they can’t show how common MST is overall.

VA offers free counseling and treatment for conditions related to MST. You don’t need a disability rating, and you don’t need to have reported it or have proof.

VA offers mental health care for depression, PTSD and substance use as part of its care for women veterans. Low mood can creep in during big changes, like leaving service, having a baby or losing your team.

Women deploy, lead, treat the wounded and make hard calls. Guilt, grief and a sense of betrayal after events that cross your values can follow anyone who served.

VA’s Maternity Care Coordinators answer questions about services and coverage throughout your pregnancy. To find one, ask your VA provider or your local Women Veterans Program Manager.

Pregnancy and the months after birth can bring up old trauma or new worries. Tell your care team how you are feeling, not just how your body is doing.

VA lists gynecologic and fertility treatment among its specialty services for women veterans. Trouble getting pregnant can bring grief and stress, and both deserve support.

VA provides reproductive health care that includes support around menopause. Hot flashes, poor sleep and mood changes can make PTSD or low mood feel heavier.

VA offers pain care and treatment for musculoskeletal injuries, plus prosthetics and sensory aids, including items made for women such as post-mastectomy products.

Pain, poor sleep and stress feed each other. Treating one often helps the others.

You don’t have to be calm all the time to be a good parent. Simple, honest words help: “Mom is having a hard day. It isn’t your fault, and I’m getting help.”

Small things that help

• Ask for help with childcare so you can get to appointments
• Keep a few steady routines, like a bedtime story
• Let kids be kids, not your helpers or counselors
• Plan short, fun moments together

Trauma, especially sexual trauma, can affect closeness and trust. Going slowly, saying what you need, and getting support together can help.

Recently separated veterans and their families can use Military OneSource’s free, confidential support for up to 365 days after leaving service. Vet Centers also offer family and couples counseling.

Try this week

• Book one appointment just for you
• Name one thing someone else can take off your list
• Protect 20 minutes a day that is only yours

Staff help with enrolling, setting up appointments, eligibility questions (including disability ratings), and connecting you with your local VA or women’s health contact.

Hours: Monday to Friday, 8 a.m. to 10 p.m. ET, and Saturday, 8 a.m. to 6:30 p.m. ET.

Each local VA medical center has a Women Veterans Program Manager. They coordinate services, from primary care to specialized care for long-term conditions or reproductive health.

You can find yours through VA’s online locator, by calling your medical center, or through the Women Veterans Call Center.

VA provides free, confidential counseling and treatment for mental and physical health conditions related to MST. You don’t need a disability rating or proof, and you don’t need to have reported it at the time.

VA’s Women’s Health Reengagement Training (heaRT) handbook is for transitioning or recently separated women veterans. It explains how to get started with VA health care.

In one year, about 53,000 women veterans enrolled in VA health care, a 20% jump from the year before.

• Ask women at veteran events if they served, just as you would ask men
• Don’t ask whether she “saw combat” to decide if she counts
• Let her choose what to share, and don’t push for details
• Thank her for her service, and mean it

Being recognized can make it easier for a woman to see herself as a veteran and to reach out for the care she earned.

• Employers: include women in veteran hiring and employee groups
• Faith and community groups: invite women veterans to speak or lead
• Veteran groups: put women in leadership and on advisory boards
• Veterans Day events: show women in pictures and speeches

One report found that having women on a local veterans’ committee visibly changed the conversation.

Firearms were involved in about half of suicides among women veterans in 2024, more often than among non-veteran women. Putting time and distance between someone in crisis and a firearm saves lives.

How you can help

• Ask: “Are you thinking about suicide?” Asking does not put the idea in her head.
• Help store firearms safely, or with someone she trusts, during hard times.
• Listen without judging.
• Offer to call the Veterans Crisis Line together: dial 988 then press 1.

• 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: call or text 988
• Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741
• National Domestic Violence Hotline: 800-799-7233, or text START to 88788
• Vet Center Call Center: 1-877-927-8387, 24/7
• Veterans Crisis Line: dial 988 then press 1, or text 838255
• Women Veterans Call Center: call or text 855-829-6636

If you served in another country’s forces, ask your country’s veterans’ agency what support exists for women who served. Veterans: coming home & life after service lists lines in the UK, Canada and Australia.

Findahelpline.com lists free, confidential helplines in many countries, searchable by country and topic.