Massage, touch & your mind
Kind, wanted touch is one of the oldest ways humans comfort each other. It can soothe the mind as well as the body.
By the numbers
Touch, massage and wellbeing in a few numbers.
United States
Research
Why touch matters
Touch is a sense, a language and a comfort.
Touch does two jobs. It tells you about the world, like whether something is hot, sharp or soft. And it carries feeling, like the comfort of a hand on your shoulder.
Researchers have found special nerve fibres in hairy skin, like the arms and face, that seem to carry the pleasant, rewarding feeling of gentle touch. This may be part of why a slow, kind touch can feel so calming.
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In one study, people who got more hugs seemed better protected from the effects of stress and conflict. The researchers concluded that hugging may be a strong way to show support.
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A large 2024 review found touch had meaningful benefits for pain, depression and anxiety in adults.
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Researchers note that for touch to be helpful, it needs to feel pleasant to the person receiving it.
What research says about touch
Real benefits, and honest limits.
A 2024 review combined results from 137 studies of touch, from massage for adults to skin-to-skin contact for newborns. Touch helped with many outcomes, both physical and mental.
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In adults, touch interventions helped with pain, depression and anxiety. People living with a health condition benefited more for mental health than healthy adults did.
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Physical benefits were similar whether touch came from a person or an object. But for mental health, touch from another person helped more than touch from an object or robot.
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In adults, more sessions of touch were linked to bigger improvements in depression, anxiety and pain. Making each session longer did not improve results.
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Adults benefited about equally from touch by someone they knew and touch from a health professional. For newborns, touch from a parent helped more than touch from staff.
Massage therapy: what’s known
What massage can and can’t do, based on the evidence.
Massage therapy means pressing, rubbing and moving the muscles and other soft tissues of the body. Swedish massage is the most common kind in Western countries. Others include sports massage, clinical massage, Shiatsu and Tuina.
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A review of 12 studies found massage worked better than doing nothing for neck or shoulder pain, but not better than other active treatments. Benefits may only last a short time.
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For low-back pain, massage gave some short-term relief, but reviewers had very little confidence in the evidence. For knee osteoarthritis, most studies found short-term pain relief.
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A review of 9 studies found massage for at least 5 weeks improved pain, anxiety and depression in people with fibromyalgia, but did not help sleep problems.
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Massage can be part of supportive care for people with cancer, with precautions. A review found some evidence it may ease pain and anxiety, but the quality of the evidence was very low.
Therapists may need to use lighter pressure on sensitive areas. Talk with your care team first.
Hugs, closeness & connection
How everyday touch can buffer stress.
In one study, 404 healthy adults reported their hugs and conflicts every evening for two weeks. They were then exposed to a cold virus. Among those who got sick, people who received more hugs had milder symptoms.
Hugs seemed to explain about a third of the protective effect of feeling supported. The researchers concluded that hugging may be an effective way to show support. Because it was an observational study, it shows a link, not proof that hugs cause the protection.
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Holding hands, a long hug or a shoulder rub can build closeness without pressure. Agreeing that some touch is “just affection” helps both people relax.
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Friendly touch looks different in every family and culture. Some people hug often, others prefer a handshake or a pat on the back. All of these can carry warmth.
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Partner dancing, martial arts, team sports, braiding a friend’s hair or volunteering to care for animals can all bring safe, shared touch into your life, along with connection and belonging.
When you miss touch
Skin hunger is real, and there are gentle ways to ease it.
Going a long time without kind touch can leave you feeling empty or lonely. People sometimes call this “skin hunger” or “touch starvation”. It is not a diagnosis, but it is a real human need.
During the first COVID-19 lockdown, a survey of 1,746 people found that those who had less intimate touch reported more anxiety and loneliness. Craving for touch grew the longer distancing went on.
Times when touch can be scarce
- After a breakup, divorce or the death of a partner
- In a long-distance relationship
- Later in life, especially when living alone
- Living alone or far from family
- Times of illness, isolation or hospital stays
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Many people find the slow rhythm of petting an animal calming. If you can’t have a pet, you could volunteer at a shelter or spend time with a friend’s pet.
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For adults, touch from a professional helped about as much as touch from someone familiar in research studies.
A massage, a haircut or a hand treatment can give you a gentle dose of touch, as long as it feels comfortable to you.
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Touch from objects can still bring comfort, even though research suggests touch from people helps mental health more.
A warm shower, wrapping up in a blanket or cuddling a pillow can be soothing on lonely nights.
Soothing touch you can give yourself
Self-massage, a hand on your heart, and weighted blankets.
You don’t always need another person for comforting touch. Gentle self-touch can be a quiet way to calm down and show yourself some kindness.
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Try it
- Place one or both hands on your chest.
- Feel the warmth of your hands.
- Breathe slowly and notice your chest rise and fall.
- Say something kind to yourself, like “This is hard, and I’m here.”
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Try it
- Use a little lotion if you like.
- Press your thumb into the palm of your other hand in small circles.
- Gently squeeze along each finger from base to tip.
- Stroke slowly from wrist to fingertips.
- Switch hands.
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Cross your arms and hold your upper arms, or wrap your arms around your middle. Squeeze gently and rock a little if it feels good. Some people find the firm pressure grounding.
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A 2020 review of 8 studies found weighted blankets may be a helpful tool for reducing anxiety, but there was not enough evidence that they help with insomnia.
A 2020 Swedish trial with 120 adults with insomnia and mental health conditions found that people using a heavy blanket reported less severe insomnia. But sleep measured by a wrist device did not change much.
Touch for babies & children
From skin-to-skin at birth to teaching kids about consent.
The World Health Organization recommends kangaroo mother care for babies born early or small. This means ongoing skin-to-skin contact, starting right after birth. It can raise survival for preterm babies by as much as a third, and helps prevent infections and keep babies warm.
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In the 2024 review of touch studies, newborns benefited more when touch came from a parent, usually the mother, than from health care staff.
WHO also notes kangaroo care can be empowering and reassuring for mothers and families, and partners can help by supporting the mother.
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A review found massage helped most premature babies gain weight. For healthy full-term babies, a review found no clear benefit.
Many parents still enjoy gentle massage as a calm, close moment with their baby.
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Let children choose how to greet people: a hug, a high five, a wave or a smile. Ask “Do you want a hug?” and respect “no”. This teaches them that touch should always feel OK, and that they can speak up if it doesn’t.
Touch, consent & trauma
Touch only helps when it’s wanted. You always get to choose.
Not everyone enjoys touch, and that is completely OK. Some people have sensory differences that make touch feel too intense. Others have been hurt and find touch frightening. Culture, faith and personal comfort also shape what feels right.
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After trauma, touch, even kind touch, can bring up fear or memories. That is a common response, not a failure. You can rebuild comfort slowly, starting with touch you control, like holding a warm mug or a soft blanket.
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For some people, light touch feels scratchy or alarming, while firm pressure feels calming. Others prefer no touch at all. These are real needs, not being “difficult”.
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You can always
- Ask for lighter or firmer pressure
- Ask the therapist to explain what they’ll do first
- Keep clothing on
- Say which areas are off limits
- Stop the session at any time, for any reason
Getting a massage safely
Finding a qualified therapist and knowing when to check first.
Most states regulate massage therapy. Therapists usually need to finish an approved training program and pass an exam. There is also a national certification board for therapeutic massage and bodywork.
Questions to ask a therapist
- Are you licensed or certified?
- Does my insurance cover this?
- How many sessions might I need, and what will it cost?
- What training and experience do you have?
Massage is low risk for most people, but rare serious problems have been reported, like blood clots, nerve injury and broken bones. Some cases involved vigorous kinds of massage, such as deep tissue massage. Older adults may be at higher risk.
When and where to get help
When loneliness, pain or past hurt needs more support.
Signs to reach out
- Low mood or worry lasts weeks or gets in the way of daily life
- Pain or tension that doesn’t ease, or keeps getting worse
- Touch brings up memories or fear that are hard to handle
- You feel deeply lonely or cut off most of the time
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The 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline connects you with a trained crisis counselor by call, text or chat (988lifeline.org), any time.
Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741 from anywhere in the U.S. to reach a trained counselor by text, 24/7.
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Talk with your clinical provider about whether massage fits your health needs, and ask a massage therapist about their training and credentials.
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Find A Helpline is a free directory of crisis and support lines in more than 175 countries, by phone, text or chat.
📝 Worksheets for this guide
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Sources
- National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health (NCCIH). Massage Therapy: What You Need To Know
- Nature Human Behaviour (peer-reviewed) (2024). A systematic review and multivariate meta-analysis of the physical and mental health benefits of touch interventions (Packheiser et al., Nature Human Behaviour)
- Psychological Science (peer-reviewed) (2015). Does Hugging Provide Stress-Buffering Social Support? A Study of Susceptibility to Upper Respiratory Infection and Illness (Cohen et al., Psychological Science 26(2): 135–147)
- Royal Society Open Science (peer-reviewed) (2021). Social touch deprivation during COVID-19: effects on psychological wellbeing and craving interpersonal touch (von Mohr, Kirsch & Fotopoulou, Royal Society Open Science 8: 210287)
- Neuron (peer-reviewed) (2014). Discriminative and affective touch: sensing and feeling (McGlone, Wessberg & Olausson, Neuron 82(4): 737–755)
- American Journal of Occupational Therapy (peer-reviewed) (2020). Weighted Blanket Use: A Systematic Review (Eron et al., American Journal of Occupational Therapy 74(2))
- Journal of Clinical Sleep Medicine (peer-reviewed) (2020). A randomized controlled study of weighted chain blankets for insomnia in psychiatric disorders (Ekholm, Spulber & Adler, Journal of Clinical Sleep Medicine 16(9): 1567–1577)
- World Health Organization (WHO) (2023). New resources released to help more preterm and low birthweight babies benefit from kangaroo mother care
- 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
- National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH). Help for Mental Illnesses
- Crisis Text Line. Crisis Text Line
- Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). Crisis Text Line (Disaster Behavioral Health Information Series resource)
- ThroughLine. Find A Helpline
- International Association for Suicide Prevention (IASP). If you’re in crisis, help is available right now (Crisis centres)
This guide is for education and self-care. It is not a diagnosis or a substitute for professional care. Please talk to a counselor or clinical provider about your health. Reviewed October 2026.

